The holidays are a fun time of the year for many people, filled with friends, family, food, festivities and in many cases—alcohol. For those who are actively sober or in recovery, this can be a difficult time. 

At Knox County Community Health Center, we know that the holidays can trigger a relapse or are a struggle for some people. We reached out to our staff member, Paul Hart-Ruthenbeck, a Licensed Chemical Dependency Counselor and a person in recovery from alcohol use disorder, to get his input and help for those that want to have a healthy and sober holiday.

 

We encourage all people to read this blog and be willing to help those in their lives that are working hard to remain sober. A little support goes a long way in helping someone retain their sobriety. 

 

Paul’s most important message? “First and foremost: RECOVERY NEEDS TO BE MORE IMPORTANT THAN ATTENDING AN EVENT OR GATHERING. If someone questions whether they can attend an event and not stay sober, they should not attend if at all possible. Always remember that the best way to deal with triggers is to avoid your triggers if at all possible.”

 

What is a Substance Use Disorder Safety Plan? 

A Substance Use Disorder safety plan is your personal plan that you have thought about so you can participate in activities and remain in recovery. 

• One of the most important parts of a recovery plan is to be honest with yourself about where you are in your own recovery journey. 
• Ask yourself this question: “Is your recovery strong enough, at this given time, to attend/participate in this activity and not risk relapse?” Paul always has an exit plan in place. If he is going to an event where he knows alcohol will be served, he drives separately so he can leave if he becomes triggered. This sometimes means that he and his wife take two cars in case he wants to leave and so she can stay to enjoy the event. (Paul is extremely lucky to have a supportive wife who understands that his recovery needs come first!) 
• It also helps to be open about your recovery status with as many people as possible to avoid people offering mood altering substances to you at any event. 
• A safety plan needs to incorporate your sober supports, people who you can call 24/7 if you become triggered. 

 

How do I put my SUD safety plan into action when needed?

You can have the best safety plan possible, but if you are not prepared to use it, then it will be useless. 

• Create a keyword to use at any time with a family member or friend when you need to leave a situation because of becoming triggered. 
• Have your sober peer supports programmed into the speed dial of your cell phone so it is easier to call when you need help. 
• A safety plan needs to be as simple as possible to implement, otherwise it is too easy to talk yourself out of using your supports. 
• Always remember that it is not a sign of weakness, rather a sign of strength, to reach out and ask for help from your supports. 
• Pay attention to your triggers. Are you hungry, angry, lonely, tired, or have too much time with a friend or family member that stresses you out? Leave if you have any of these feelings or ask your sober companion for help.
• Have a car with you or someone that can drive you if you need to leave.

 

How can I celebrate the holidays while staying sober? How can I set the stage for success before attending or hosting an event? (How can others help?)

This is a hard concept for people early in recovery to comprehend. There is the very real possibility that they have never celebrated the holidays sober. Just remind yourself that it is possible to have fun without using.

• Implement your SUD safety plan when necessary.
• If you are hosting the event it is perfectly acceptable to have no mood altering substances in your home and to ask attendees not to bring any substances. 
• Be open and honest with people about your recovery status. You may be surprised by the responses you get from others. Remember: for people who do not have a substance use disorder, it is not a big deal to attend an event that is substance free. 
• Enlist the support of your family and friends to attend events with no alcohol.
• Celebrate in a different way—Go for a hike, spend time bowling, plan a game night or whatever else you can think of. Provide snacks and non-alcoholic beverages.
• Celebrate your sobriety and lean into the joy of the holidays—while focusing on your sobriety.
• Keep a non-alcoholic drink in your hand at all times. Most of the time, no one pays attention to what others are drinking at a party.
• Make plans to celebrate with your other sober friends. 
• Attend a meeting before/after the event.
• Ask one of your sober friends to join you for the event.
• Keep to your routine as much as possible and make your sobriety your top priority!

Remember why you chose the path towards sobriety. What led you to lead this way of life? What have you learned so far? How does being sober help you feel better? Keeping these questions at the front of your mind can help you have a healthy and sober holiday season. 

As always, our counselors at the Knox County Community Health Center are here to help. Schedule with Paul at Moore Family Practice, KPH, or the Danville Community Health Center by calling: 740-399-8008.